Just read through all of this - I really like it!
It's good writing, with good flow and pace. And it compels me to read more!
There are a couple of grammar issues here and there that I found a little jarring at times, and if you want, I can go through it and pick them out for you. Though it is a NaNo, so that might not be something you want done while it's still November?
Anyway, I intend to draw L'ark, probably injecting into his own mouth (because that is so delightfully squicky), and will prolly end up doodling Traveller at some point.